Ummm...

Okay so maybe I was being a bit hasty- like, you know, I don't need a relationship because I love being unattached kinda stint.. But here is the truth- I am happy... but anyone who says they absolutely don't want a little loving is not being honest with themselves. Seriously, there are times when I secretly cross my fingers behind my back every time I walk into a new bar or am about to meet new acquaintances. Deep down, I don't think it would be so bad to drop the single status. I am reminded of a "situation" not too long ago, where being single was the worst thing that had ever happened and I would have just died to be a "we".

I had been invited to dine with some friends and we met up one fine summer evening on the street before entering. As I watched the people file in, I noticed some unfamiliar faces. My girlfriend confided that she had invited some new "couple friends". As I stood in line waiting for the Maitre D' to seat our reserved table of 12, I took a good look at the group around me and noticed that we were 13. The gang piled in and without hestitation a myriad of confusion broke out as people tried to figure out the seating arrangements to ensure that those two and these two could chat, and those two and these two couldn't sit next to each other... oh and those two and these two have nothing in common.... you catch my drift. Finally, after all were seated, the only one left standing was... of course- me. You got it: 12 +1. As the restaurant staff hurried to get me seated, they found an extra chair in the back room (our waiter was required to yell over the louder than normal chatter of the diners to another waiter nearest the kitchen to ensure the chair was retrieved). At last the chair arrived and I was placed at the head of the table (actually at the head of the table, in the area where the wait staff zoom through with plates and call orders to the kitchen- the seat where huffs were snarled as they squeezed past my chair).

If this wasn't bad enough, I was seated in front of couple I hadn't met before and after some brief introductions the new couple inquired , "Boyfriend couldn't make it ?". With scenes from Bridget Jones playing over and over in my mind, I stammered, "I'm single". "Really?", they chimed in unison. "Really", I maintained. The attention quickly turned as they engaged with the other diners. I excused myself and made a mad dash for the some air. As I held back tears that began to sting my eyes- I knew right there and then that sometimes I really didn't like being single at all.