One's a Company

Having moved out out of the comfort of my family home and on my own at the age of 22 - I've had my fair share of living arrangements. Looking back, I probably should have stayed at home until I at least finished University - saved some cash and built a comfortable stash of bills.

But with choices come experiences. For eight years, I lived on my own, well not entirely on my own.. I of course as so many have had to do , I've shared accommodations with other people.

Roommates came and went as the years went by: and so did my sanity. My first apartment was with a girlfriend, we lived together for a few years. We shared laughter, some tears and of course a few fights (I'm happy to report we are still talking). I've shared with a man who didn't want to clean because he argued that he did not contribute to the dust and grime. He also refused to split the purchase of toilet paper claiming he didn't use as much as females. He was also a bar tender- and quite the ladies man! We had a younger male who rejoiced in his cleaning skills, but never laid a hand on any of the supplies- he also blessed us with a cat in heat. Some of my best years were spent with two girlfriends- but as life went on they moved on with their lives. My last two years were spent with a male who hid from me- he stole my food, was late on bills and nearly caused me a serious mental breakdown.

There was no better time to leave my apartment after eight years and move on with my own life. The first few weeks living on my own were bliss. You can eat, clean, vedge, watch whatever you want and even dance around naked. But being on your own slowly loses it's appeal. I know one day, I will look back on this alone time as a god-send- but there are days when it gets pretty lonely. Sometimes, I catch myself talking to no one, and once I actually caught myself talking to an inanimate object.

There is something to be said for sharing living space with others- even if you think you're going to go mad. There is a comfort in interpersonal relationships even if you're not romantically involved. For now, I'll just have to be content with my own company- but two's company is just that much better.

Item number 57

I crossed another thing off my list last week-end. Number 57 on the list was to stay in hostel. I'd always imagined that my hostel experience would have been in some exotic area- maybe Australia or New Zealand or even Thailand. Looking back on when I wrote this to-do item on my list, I would have never expected it would have been accomplished in Seoul, Korea.

Travelling to Seoul with two 22 year old males was quite the experience- staying in a hostel was quite another. We were headed to Hongdae, Seoul Korea. A trendy and young area of Seoul with plenty of clubs, people and things to do. The boys decided in advance on a hostel stay- lodging for a rock bottom price!

I was slightly apprehensive as I had never even stayed in something like this. I was used to the hotel life, a room with one bed, own bathroom and living space. Even in Europe I did it in style. My initial thoughts on a hostel were of concern. Who would be sleeping there? How many people? What about bathroom etiquette, food, noise? Each passing thought brought on another- until I to force myself to quit the bantering in my head.

We arrived at Hongdae Guesthouse promptly at 10:00 p.m. The guys had no trouble at all introducing themselves to the owner; and getting acquainted with the layout. We were shown to our quarters by the lovely owner, Mary. A quirky and humorous woman, she bustled about ensuring our accommodations were satisfactory. We were given the code, and ushered inside.

One bathroom, one computer, a half kitchen and two bunk beds. A upstairs loft housed three mattresses on the floor. The three of us trudged upstairs, unpacking a few belongings and setting up for the night. For a mere 20, 000 won we were housed, showered and treated to toast, coffee and orange juice in the morning.

The guests were travellers coming and going from all over Asia. Some had been there a week- and a few were just passing the night. The hardest part was the universal washroom- with a stranger right outside the door tapping away on the computer's keyboard. Privacy in a hostel doesn't quite exist!

The bottom line is that hostels are the cheapest way to go. I'm not sure I would do it again- unless of course it was in some exotic location like Costa Rica or Bali. But at least, I've crossed another item off the list!

Routines

One of my good girlfriend's told me something once that I have never forgotten. Being half way around the World this statement couldn't be any truer.

She told me that it doesn't matter where you go, or where you choose live-- you always end up back in the same routine. The routine that is comfortable and familiar.

Despite struggling at times with my life here in Korea- I've managed to just about fit all of my familiar things into my life here.

I work, go to the gym, eat, download all of my favorite (North American) shows, read, sleep and go at it again. A few nights a week, I may enjoy the company of my Korean teachers and other nights I meet up with friends for dinner and drinks. Nothing much has changed- except I'm doing it all in Korea!

The best part is that while I've fallen back into my routines- I get the added benefits of seeing some amazing things; learning all about a new culture; taking day trips and week-end trips all over the country.

I may have left the comfort of my routine back home; and although I'm making new ones here- I'm shaking things up everyday and look forward to the next adventure all the time.

Livin it Up!

Here in Korea- I don't really feel thirty. I mean well yes, of course the mirror reflects back a few (minor) tolls of gravity on my body- but besides that I am living it up as though I were some twenty year old most of the time.

I am one of few people around here in the three-oh category. I am surrounded by early to mid-twenty somethings- most of whom have just graduated from University and left the comfort of their parents homes.

The kids here party like rock stars and manage to make it out every Friday and Saturday to the hippest bars and clubs. They stumble home at all of hours of the morning- sleep it off and return several hours later to do it all over again.

I attempted to keep up with this lifestyle my first few weeks of being here- for the most part I was able to keep up (really there is nothing much else to do here on weekends)- and to my contentment many were shocked when they discovered my stamina when they learned of my age.

Last month, I came to the conclusion that the parade around town re-living my life as though I were twenty must come to an end. I've become aware of the fact that I just cannot handle going out two nights in a row anymore. My body has rejected this back-to-back notion with full force. It is reminded of my late nights and weekend binges back in the day- and has cautioned me to act my own age.

So as the decision to live it up one night a week has surfaced- I will try and make the best of it while my body is still able to keep up.

Holy Over the Hill

Weeknights can get a bit boring around here. To mix things up my friends and I try and meet up mid week to have a drink and grab dinner. There are so many restaurants around Daegu- you really have a lot to choose from.

You can find just about anything from traditional Korean, to Japanese, Chinese and even Indian. There are some wonderful Italian places, and we've even found some cozy French restaurants. Of course there is the all American eateries too. Over here they're called ex-pat places.

Within are first few weeks of arrival we located a highly talked about restaurant and sports lounge. They call it the Holy Grill. Located east of Rodeo Street it's a 2 floor establishment. The menu has some quality tastes from home, including Mexican food, real buffalo chicken wings, burgers and the best staple from back home- poutine.

My friend and I had heard about Wednesday Night's Wing Night- say we decided to give it a go this week. The sports lounge was empty with only the two of us chowing down on some fantastic wings and fries. The screen was playing highlights of the Hockey games- and really it felt just like being at home.

We were kinda hoping there would be more atmosphere- or at least a few more bodies- but nevertheless we entertained ourselves. As we finished the last several bites of our meal, two new customers entered the place.

I must admit, the male caught my eye. He was awfully cute. Then from behind him the female figure emerged. As the two took a seat at the far end of the bar, we struck up a conversation.

Turns out Mr. Looker was from my hometown, and he and his girlfriend attended the same University as myself. The girlfriend was absolutely ecstatic to know that we attended the same University, and proudly informed me that she had just graduated in May. That's correct- May 2009. As she took a swig from her beer, she eagerly asked me when I had graduated. She took another gulp and awaited my response.

"Umm, 2003", I replied with an edge of confidence. The girl wrinkled her nose and said half hazardly, "wowwww. That's a long time ago!", and returned to her drink.

And there it was: A young twenty something alluding to the fact that I was OLD. The nerve.

I contemplated how to respond. On one hand, I could have agreed with her and made a fuss and rambled on about how old I really was... but then it hit me. I was reminded at that moment of a quote I had skimmed over a while back:

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter (Mark Twain).

Bubble Baths

I have always loved a good soak in the tub. Nothing beats being nestled into a bath, surrounded by warm porcelain , candles and a terrycloth pillow. Enveloped in layers of aromatic foam, steam and hot water. Soaking your limbs to the sounds of soft background music. Completely alone.

After two months of wrestling with my daily shower routine in my small 4x4 box-of-a- bathroom the thought of soaking my body in a bath was overwhelming.

Here in Korea bathrooms are not usually equipped with any type of fancy claw-foot tubs but they do have what's called public baths. You can find one of these bath houses just about everywhere within a 2 mile radius.

Being a newbie to Korea; we first heard of these establishments within days of our arrival. With no idea what to expect- my girlfriend and I decided to try one a couple of weeks ago. Walking around downtown one day- we spotted the sign and went in on whim. (enter record scratching here).

For about 4,000 won (that's roughly 3.50$) you are handed two very teeny towels, enough to say .... dry your hands and were quickly ushered towards the entrance.

With quizzical brows, we fumbled around the wall of small lockers. As a Korean woman brushed past us, we noted she carefully placed her shoes in the locker, and then went on to another desk. She gave us what we thought was a side glanced semi head nod- and so we followed pursuit.

With our shoes neatly tucked away, we knew that the next step would be to strip. As we entered the lounge, we were immediately blinded by buck- nakedness. A few women gaped as the two foreigners walked briskly towards their assigned locker numbers. They continued to stare even as we began to peel back layers of clothing. There was a slight awkwardness in knowing that in less than 30 seconds the two us would be in our birthday suits in front of not only each other but amongst 35 Korean women of all shapes and sizes.

We stared each other in the eye and both shrugged slightly. "This is Korea", we chimed in unison. As we took the iddy bitty towelette to cover whatever we could we bee lined it for the bath.

I scanned this new universe quickly- trying to avoid eyeballing the thirty or so bathing women who were all goggling back at us. Most stopped dead in mid-rinse to get a good look at the fresh white bodies. Horrified at their lack of privacy- we found our way into the closest nook- the steam room. With stifled giggles- we were safe. The hard part was trying to keep our conversation going all the while sitting their totally in the nude. We peered through the steamed glass to get a good look at our surroundings.

The public bath is laid out on one floor- it contains a sauna, a steam room, and a cold pool. There is a hot tub, and two other rectangular hot baths. This one even included a warm bath equipped with powerful jet sprays that send intense pressure to your muscles. And then there are about 25 shower stations lined against the back walls. Everything is out in the open, including the women.

The experience was interesting to say the least. With no knowledge of Korean and what the heck we were doing- we just did our best. Hopping from one pool to the next, taking it all in. The obvious staring was quite aggravating after awhile- but then again I think they were more concerned with our lack of hair down there than anything else. As shocking as it was for them- trust me it was a real shocker to be bombarded with bush. In case you were never informed- Korean women go at it "au naturelle" .

This concept of publicly bathing is a hard one to get around- as North American's we usually cover up as much as possible when in the gym locker room or any public place where undressing is required. We are used to shower curtains and privacy- but here in Korea if you want to get a soak on- you need to brave the masses.

I've been twice now on my own- I've held my head high and done my own thing. I still struggle with walking from the locker to the bath (which is about 8 meters away) with only a face cloth to cover my heiny- but I hope one day to just prance right on through without even a care in the world. Until that day arrives, I'm still resorting to leaving the contacts at home so that I don't see a thing.

Tip #1: Better to go at it in two's your first time. Language barriers and nudity may pose a problem to some.
Tip #2: Go prepared. Bring a large size bath towel and toiletries!

"We"

We've all known those couples who flaunt their relationships. Those that are in-your-face about being a "we". The ones who can't keep their hands off each other... the ones who can't be without their significant other for more than 5 minutes and let everyone else in the room know about it. The ones with pet names and the ones who actually use the cutsey-wutsey tags in every sentence imaginable. You know... the ones that make us singletons want to be sick.

It seems everyone here is in a couple. I mean the Korean ones. With almost 49 million people to choose from- it seems there really are plenty of fish in the sea. Dating Korean couples are slightly more different than those we are accustomed to in North America (as noted above). They have taken the "we" to another level entirely.

Most Koreans in dating relationships advertise their couple hood- with clothes. Couples walk around in matching shirts- dress shirts, sweatshirts, t-shirts and I've even witnessed some sporting the same jackets and a few with matching shoes.

The stores here cater to this like cotton candy vendors at the fair. Matching cell phones, pyjamas and even underwear.

I'm not sure how well this concept would fly back home- but for now it's all around me. Repeat this mantra: it's not wrong, it's just different.