All alone for Christmas

For the first time in my life, it really doesn't feel like Christmas time at all. Downtown Daegu is lined with a few Christmas trees full of twinkling lights and sparkling decorations- carols can be heard as you wander past the rows of shops- bakeries present beautiful sweet treats in the windows... but the Christmas cheer is far from home.

This year, as I celebrate Christmas a little differently in the land of the morning calm- I realize that even though I may be "alone" for Christmas, miles away from family and friends- I am not completely alone. For those of us who find ourselves in Korea for Christmas we have gathered around and made new Christmas memories. There may not be any chestnuts roasting on an open fire, snowflakes streaming from the skies or gifts under the tree- but we do have new friendships to toast to.

For the past 30 years Christmas has been spent dashing from one house to the other, lugging gifts, and indulging in one meal after another. This year I have avoided Christmas crowds; gift lists; trimming the tree; wrapping; packaging; cooking; baking; cleaning; driving; de-decorating the tree, and weeks vacuuming up the remnants of the pine scented tree (the most dreaded of holiday activities) that have made up my Christmas ritual year after year.

Although I am rejoicing in the fact that this year I have managed to escape the Christmas craziness- there is something to be said for celebrating the real spirit of Christmas.

Nothing feels more like Christmas than to have friends and family dropping in, the joy and laughter that comes with gathering around the tree; giving and receiving presents and toasting to the holidays. Despite all my delight to the no stress approach this year, I think I would trade it all in just to be home for the holidays.

Templestay

In the past two years I've sat through intensive Vipassana Meditation courses. Vipasassana mediation is one of Asia's most ancient techniques of meditation attributed to Gautama Buddha. Having experienced some powerful insight, liberation and detachment during these sittings, I've always been drawn to experiencing more.

If you're going to teach English in Korea, I highly recommend participating in a TempleStay. In Korea, the temple gates open to those who wish to be introduced and experience Buddhism. The Korean Buddhism tradition has existed for over 1700 years and participating in Templestay is one of the many rich cultural experiences one can do in Korea.

For 24 hours we experienced the unique lifestyle of Buddhist practitioners. We settled on Haeinsa Temple which offers the full cultural experience. High in the mountains, surrounded by thousand year old trees, ponds, and pathways this temple offered more than just natural beauty.

We were surrounded my monks (Sunim) in traditional robes, the many temples nestled in the forests and the sounds of wind chimes clamouring in the wind. Our host was a Korean Monk who spoke perfect English, and his story touched us all. He , like many monks lived a so-called normal life just as you and I. A life of attachment, material possessions and suffering. I am so grateful for his words, wisdom and insight.

The stay begins at with an opening ceremony at 16:00- we were given traditional clothing and shown to our rooms. The men and women are of course separated. A simple dwelling: you are given blankets and pillows and sleep on the comfort of the heated floor.

We were taught about temple banner, how to bow and basic Buddhist philosophies. At 17:00 We were treated to Balwoo-gongyang (a traditional Buddhist meal) and then to the main temple for Ye-bool at the 18:00. The Ye-boo is the Buddhist ritual that pays respect to Buddha.

To participate and observe hundreds of monks in the temple, chanting and bowing was one of the most amazing and beautiful things that I have ever seen. The energy that filled the room was indescribable. We bowed with them, and quietly observed the ritual.

At 19:00 we engaged in a Da-do- a Tea Ceremony with our Sunim; where he told us of his University days, including tragic suffering that finally led him to his path of becoming a Buddhist monk. The Buddhists claim that while drinking tea we are enjoying life. The whole ceremony was quite the process from the brewing to the drinking.

We talked about life, it's meaning, Buddhist precepts, faith and the Matrix. We talked for hours, quietly reflecting and tasting our tea. Lights out was at 21:00, as Korean Buddhists are the one of the few who rise the earliest.

The Sunim's rise at 02:30. In the darkness of the night, with the moon shining high in the sky, the monks perform a traditional drum ceremony. The pre-dawn ceremony is ignited by the drums that can be heard at 03:10, waking the animals, mammals, and lastly the humans. We joined again in the main hall at 04:00. The chants awakening every human form in the room. As the monks chant in unison, you can feel the energy flowing through your entire body.

The thought of the sacredness and the awakening of our bodies and minds at 03:00 was truly eye-opening. Normally, we would all still be out at the bars traipsing around trying to make our way home.

We were shown how to bow and at 05:00 we participated in the chanting of a thousand hands led by a senior monk and performed 108 bows. We sat through a 45 minute Zen Meditation sitting with perfect posture and breathing. We were again served tea, and had delighted to a modest breakfast.

In the morning calm, we we shown how to make our own Prayer beads. 108 strung along in complete silence. The monks say the significance of making the beads is not in the bead itself- but that the beads are meaningful because they contain within them our prayers and hopes.

We walked the grounds in full meditation and the stay wrapped up shortly after lunch. For nearly 24 hours, you are connected to your body and mind- and I was reminded of how much I truly need to remove themselves from the toxicity and negative influences in the world.

As a result of enduring some major pains some years ago, I committed to a journey to seek myself. To seek my true self. My purpose, my life and my passions. I can tell you that over the past two years my path to self-discovery has taken me to places within myself I'd never dreamed of going. I don't know that I will be able to seek enlightenment- but I do know that I am closer to fulfilling my true purpose and am so grateful to those who have shown up on my path.

May all beings be happy.

One's a Company

Having moved out out of the comfort of my family home and on my own at the age of 22 - I've had my fair share of living arrangements. Looking back, I probably should have stayed at home until I at least finished University - saved some cash and built a comfortable stash of bills.

But with choices come experiences. For eight years, I lived on my own, well not entirely on my own.. I of course as so many have had to do , I've shared accommodations with other people.

Roommates came and went as the years went by: and so did my sanity. My first apartment was with a girlfriend, we lived together for a few years. We shared laughter, some tears and of course a few fights (I'm happy to report we are still talking). I've shared with a man who didn't want to clean because he argued that he did not contribute to the dust and grime. He also refused to split the purchase of toilet paper claiming he didn't use as much as females. He was also a bar tender- and quite the ladies man! We had a younger male who rejoiced in his cleaning skills, but never laid a hand on any of the supplies- he also blessed us with a cat in heat. Some of my best years were spent with two girlfriends- but as life went on they moved on with their lives. My last two years were spent with a male who hid from me- he stole my food, was late on bills and nearly caused me a serious mental breakdown.

There was no better time to leave my apartment after eight years and move on with my own life. The first few weeks living on my own were bliss. You can eat, clean, vedge, watch whatever you want and even dance around naked. But being on your own slowly loses it's appeal. I know one day, I will look back on this alone time as a god-send- but there are days when it gets pretty lonely. Sometimes, I catch myself talking to no one, and once I actually caught myself talking to an inanimate object.

There is something to be said for sharing living space with others- even if you think you're going to go mad. There is a comfort in interpersonal relationships even if you're not romantically involved. For now, I'll just have to be content with my own company- but two's company is just that much better.